Andrew Self, Manager of Instruction, Everywhere People Say Y'all
Master of the LSAT, MCAT, GMAT, and GRE, Andrew comes to Catalyst with a wealth of knowledge about standardized tests and a blazing desire to make those multiple-choice bastards pay. As Catalyst's Manager of Instruction for the great state of Texas, Andrew serves as leader and mentor to dozens of test prep gurus, from Clint up in Dallas (loves fishin', huntin' and explainin' SAT math) to Brianna down in Galveston (ain't scared of hurricanes, alligators, or the ACT). Before dedicating his life to recruiting and cultivating gifted teachers, Andrew was a student, first at Baylor University, where he majored in Film and Digital Media, and then at UT Austin, where he graduated with a Master's in Media Studies. (If you're wondering how Stephen Colbert has affected the complex relationship between broadcast journalism, politics, and society, Andrew's your man.) When he's not lassoing talented tutors into the fold, Andrew enjoys slowly but surely making his way through Time magazine's 100 Best Books list (he's been on Gravity's Rainbow since 2012), watching sports and classic comedies (one of the highlights of his life was spotting Bill Murray at a basketball game), and "sharing supposedly pretentious movies with unpretentious audiences to prove that pretentious movies aren't that pretentious after all." (Have you seen Lars von Trier's movies, Andrew?)
Why He Works for Catalyst
Sure beats writing film reviews for the Dripping Springs Dispatch.
How the Universe Has Punished Him for Being a Freakishly Good Test-Taker
“Consider the subtleness of the sea; how its most dreaded creatures glide under water, unapparent for the most part, and treacherously hidden beneath the loveliest tints of azure." So says Captain Ahab while contemplating the watery depths that harbor his all-consuming obsession, the monstrous white whale. What do these lines from Herman Melville's classic novel, Moby-Dick, have to do with Catalyst Manager of Instruction Andrew Self? Well, it just so happens that Andrew is one of an unknown number of people who suffer from cetaphobia, a crippling fear of whales. What's that, you say? Andrew lives in Austin, Texas, over 200 miles from the nearest ocean? Whales are inherently good-natured creatures who only attack humans when said humans imprison them in theme parks for kids to gawk at? Most whales subsist on a diet of small crustaceans called krill, not on a diet of small mammals called Andrew? While all of that may be true, Andrew's fear of whales is no less real than a Floridian's fear of polar bears. In other words, just because Andrew's in no real danger of actually encountering a whale, such as the 94-foot-long, 21,000-pound blue whale on display in New York's American Museum of Natural History, doesn't mean his phobia is any less valid. So, the next time you see Andrew, please don't mention any of the following trigger words: shamu, beluga, humpback, orca, and blowhole. Oh, and whatever you do: no Fudgie the Whale cakes for his birthday.
Favorite 80s Movie / Favorite 80s Nobel Laureate
Raiders of the Lost Ark / Niels Kaj Jerne (Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine, 1984)